Here's the sequel to "Two Happy Men". The 2nd man told me several things he was now doing following the workshop. He acted on a long-dormant dream, bought a piano, and is taking piano lessons. He is blissful doing so!

Additionally, he realized that he wanted to keep "giving back". He is very good with dogs, and although had a robust executive career, always trained his own dogs. Now, is a trainer for seeing-eye guide dogs and loving it!

Two happy stories and happy men.

Two recent workshop participants wrote me to tell me how happy they are.

One man, rather skeptical at the outset, went home energized, and somewhat clear on his plan. Three months later he told me how happy he was. He is deeply immersed in his piano lessons and loving it!

He is learning to train seeing-eye guide dogs. That was a "dream" he always had but never thought he could do it. When he saw Isabella Rosselini's vision - (she trains seeing-eye guide dogs in NY city) - he thought he could make it his as well. And he did! Ongoing good luck to him.

Next time, the second happy man.

I just met a couple who seem to be very much in sync with one another. They had both left their long-time jobs and could have been called "retirees".

They didn't see themselves as "retired" however - they see themselves as embarking on a truly exciting "next step" in their life.

They are moving to a new city, where they think they'll have more options for the workshop business they recently started. That, along with more speaking opportunities will keep them vital, interested, and interesting.

Finally, they are also making good on other parts of their plan: playing golf, learning Spanish, cooking new recipes regularly, making new friends, and mentoring the nieces and nephews. They will also become grandparents in less than a month! Lots going on.

I was intrigued to hear of several different "retirement" options that the extended family/parents of one of my "younger friends" had embarked on. She is actually in her early 30's with 2 children and her parents are my age!

Father - retired from top secret work in the government - is now building a new home in North Carolina. He is a handyman and is contemplating hanging out his shingle as such - no more of the "covert" government life for him! He is well aware of how much he will have to figure out in terms of new community, new friends, new social situation. Work, and keeping busy, is only the half of it!

Husband's mother - another story entirely. Has worked for an IT company for the last 25 years. Is no longer on the "cutting edge" and is fearful about even discussing retirement with her company. She wants to keep working for another 8 years until she is 70 years old. Her son fears that the company will want her to retire much sooner, perhaps even this year. He is faced with helping his mother find a financial analyst so she knows what kind of plans she has in place; she never dealt with those things. And, he is thinking he will have to help her figure out how she can remain "relevant" - something that is very important to her.

Two stories - and I think the person wiht the plan, is in such better shape. But, both scenarios are totally real and suggestive of conversations many people will begin to have with family, friends, advisors, consultants, lifestyle planners et al!

I just had dinner with some friends, whom last met with, was seven years ago, as they began a very different new life. He was a corporate lawyer in LA and she was a top marketing executive in LA. Neither had ever travelled in an RV, hiked in the national parks, or knew what they wanted to do in "retirement". However, in one of life's serendipitous moments, they met a couple who had been hiking and working in the national parks for several years. Their work in them as employees of a park management company, was to head up the front desk information function at spots like "El Tovar" and "Bright Angel" in the Grand Canyon Park.

My friends, excited now, made plans to have a similar life. They began their park careers in Zion National Park and loved every moment of the seven years. For five months they worked at the park, and for the remaining seven months they travelled, visited family, and enjoyed themselves. All this in a large RV; no more big home in the Hollywood Hills for them!

At our dinner last month, they were making plans to finish their stint with the park service this summer. They weren't sure where their 2nd set of "next steps" would take them, but they had some ideas. Keep tuned - I'll update when I know more.

Toronto Star Reporter Susan Pigg participated in a recent Life's Next Steps Workshop. Her article, Not Working Is A Tough Job, shares her impressions and what she learned from the other participants.

You'll read about the wide variety of thoughts participants have and how they plan/expect to reach their goals.

In our workshop, one of the major differences that we cite between the genders, is how men and womean differ in managing investments. We use data from TD Waterhouse, Fidelity, Charles Schwab, Citigroup, and Wachovia - which says that men are overconfident, trade stocks nearly 50% more often than women, and thereby drive up costs and lower their returns.

That fact happens, the research agrees, because men are more likely to trade, and usually to do so at the wrong times. Those times are usually during stock market lows.

Women, on the other hand, tend to stay the course, and minimize costs - selling high and buying low - which are the classics characteristics of good long-term, buy-and-hold investors.

While men tend to be overconfident, women are quicker to acknowledge what they don't know about stocks. This drives them to ask questions and to heed the answers and the advice. Because think they know more than they do, and exhibit signs of being overconfident, they tend to miss key information.

All this to say that a recent NY Times article (March 16th) on MONEY, continues to support this data. Seems like both genders have lessons to learn from one another. For men to ask questions/listen more, and not be so fast off the mark to trade. And for women, to trust their intuition/characteristics, and take more risks.

At a recent college alumni luncheon, I heard from several people about the state of their "next steps". They were pretty exciting! Here are two examples.

One woman, who had spent 25 years as a realtor, decided that she was going to act on her passion for the next 10 years at least. At age 62, she is in the throes of opening a new flower shop. It is versatile enough to serve much of her clientele in her medium-sized town, but not so large that she and an assistant will need more help.

A psychologist had done much of his clinical work with the CIA, and decided "enough is enough". He moved to a part of the country where he had always wanted to live and built on his passion for golf and sailing. BUT, he did keep his hand in, and now the CIA sends special clients to him in SE Florida for assessment. He doesn't have to brave the cold corridors of DC and VA to do that work any more!

Two neat, compelling stories of people who are doing it "their way".

One of the things I have noticed in all the recent research on the brain and how it continues to "grow" in capability, is how very positive it is for us Boomers. We can actually INCREASE our brain size by doing regular aerobic exercise and by keeping the brain active. Hence the term "plasticity" developed.

One of my favorite columnists, David Brooks (NY Times) notes that the brain is capable of creating new connections and new neurons as we age. He says that "our brains reorganize to help compensate for the effects of aging". What that means is that we retain our ability to remember emotionally nuanced events, and we are happier as we get older because we focus on positive emotional stimuli, not negative ones. He notes one final fact: gender roles begin to merge.

We know genders become more like one another, from anecdotal research gathered during our workshops! Many women become more assertive, as men become more emotionally attuned. And Boomers who perform service for younger people (students, grandkids) have more positive lives and better marriages. We are naturally inclined to serve those who come after us and to actually THRIVE while performing that role. A great boon of being older!

We came across an interesting article in the Toronto Star that nicely summarizes the situation many boomers find themselves in.

In it, our friend Patricia Lovett-Reid at TD Waterhouse is interviewed about how she finally realized she needed a retirement lifestyle plan and how she thinks it should be approached. Please note that the article was available as of today, but The Star doesn’t always keep things archived very long.